Why? - Secondhand Serenade

The buttons on my phone are worn thin
I don't think that I knew the chaos I was getting in.
But I've broken all my promises to you
I've broken all my promises to you.

Why do you do this to me?
Why do you do this so easily?
You make it hard to smile because
You make it hard to breathe
Why do you do this to me?

A phrasing that's a single tear,
Is harder than I ever feared
And you were left feeling so alone.
Because these days aren't easy
Like they have been once before
These days aren't easy anymore.

Why do you do this to me?
Why do you do this so easily?
You make it hard to smile because
You make it hard to breathe
Why do you do this to me?
To me, to me, to me.

I should have known this wasn't real
And fought it off and fought to feel
What matters most? Everything
That you feel while listening to every word that I sing.
I promise you I will bring you home
I will bring you home.

Why do you do this to me?
Why do you do this so easily?
You make it hard to smile because
You make it hard to breathe
Why do you do this to me?

Why do you do this to me?
Why do you do this so easily?
You make it hard to smile because
You make it hard to breathe
Why do you do this to me?
To me, to me, to me. 

Timing.

"This fragile game it’s like a train that’s headed nowhere. It never stops and I can’t see the exit sign." 

- "Inside of you" - The Maine

I knew how it was going to end.
I should have been ready.
But the news was something I wish I never knew
I shouldn't have asked.
I should have left it.

But no I had to be selfish and open my mouth. 
Now I have to live with these thoughts.
If I never asked I wouldn't have to try and forget.
 
The anger inside me will just keep building.
If I never asked it wouldn't be there


Until the day the the lid blows off.
And the anger pours out.
A sea of fury.
If I never asked it won't happen.


The lesson is:
"Know when the time is right to shut your mouth and stop asking questions."
 

Torn in two.

Would it be fair to assume,

When someone walks out of your life then they will stay out of it?

This is what I assumed.

I let everything lasting memory and feeling attached to him go.

My best friend. My everything.

Even if he were a huge part of my life

I had to let everything go for my own sake.

With time,

Everything fell back into place.

Everything was getting better.

Life was back to "normal"

"Whatever normal is.. My normal is WAY different to your normal."

That's because you're not real!

But yes.

Things were settling down

And I realised I had someone amazing right in front of my eyes.

So you could say things were inches from perfect.

Then he came back.

"I love you"

Where the last words he said to me.

The first after all this time apart was also

"I love you"

And so,

Like water breaking a flood gate.

The memories and feelings rushed back.

Emotions flying everywhere.

Instantly I was wrapped around his finger all over again.

Thing almost went straight back to where they were.

But there is the one person I love more than anything.

In which, I can't and won't give them up for any one or thing.

I fought so hard for them I cannot throw it away.

So now I am torn in two.

I am confused.

The only thing I seem to be thinking about right now

Is..

"Case 1 or 2? Person 1 or 2?"

Um, person number 2!

The question's running through my head:

Where are you know?

How much have you drunk?

What are you doing?

Are you okay?

And that's not even a quarter of them.

I can tell who I care about more.

I have no nails left to bite.

I'm worrying and there is still an hour to go.

But there is 8hours, even more till I get to talk to you.

I don't know what's happening.

I would give anything to be there.

I don't know what to do.

Insanity.

My favourite memory, is when I met you.
My favourite sound is your soothing voice.
My favourite colour is your eyes, that beautiful shade of blue.
My favourite place to be is by your side.
My favourite sight is you
My favourite feeling is your hand intertwined with mine
My favourite thought is all about you


I love your smile,
I love your laugh,
I love your sense of humour
I love the way you blush
I love the way you make me  feel.

I think I just love you.
I think you are my favourite person to walk this earth.

You are everything I ask for, and a little bit more.
I can't get you out of my head. My every thought involves you.
I think I'm going crazy. But mainly crazy over you.